Last week over on the Foxhound Blog I wrote about a fabulous online community called PlanBig, which essentially helps bring people together to make things happen! I’ve recently joined the PlanBig community and in my post I shared a little bit about some of the cool people and plans I have encountered via the PlanBig site.

One of these plans is called Soften the F*ck Up and is all about challenging the stereotype of the ‘real man’ in Australia because right now too many Aussie men are turning to suicide. The campaign seeks to reduce the stigma of mental health amongst men, because without reducing the stigma, we can’t promote mental health literacy and empower young men to seek help.

The Soften the F*ck Up site was launched on Friday and I urge you check it out and share it with all the men you care about.

On the site you will find some excellent resources, videos and personal stories. There is also this powerful manifesto:

This manifesto is a call to arms for men around the world to reunite and have each other’s backs. This is a call for men to bring back the meaning of mateship and of being a man. Being strong isn’t about who can keep a stiff upper lip for the longest. It is time to challenge the status quo.
I am a strong man. I am a strong man who knows who I am and is comfortable with that. One who empowers and treat others the way that I want to be treated – with justice, equity and respect.
I am a strong man.
I am a strong man because I care for others just as much as I would care for myself. I am going to make sure they take action if something doesn’t feel right or if I am not feeling well. This means talking about it with my mates, my family and anyone who is able to help me.
I am a strong man.
I am a strong man who looks out for my friends just as I want them to look out for me. This means checking in on, supporting, and empowering my mates and never leaving them behind. I’m going to have the tough conversations when we need to.
I am tough enough to admit faults.
I am strong enough to look after my family, my mates, people around me and myself.
I am man enough to have the tough conversations.

I feel incredibly lucky to be able to say that last week I got to hear the funny and insightful Brene Brown speak in real life! I loved it – laughed, cried, got goosebumps and got thinking about embracing vulnerability (my own & others) in my life.

Brené has spent the past ten years studying vulnerability, courage, authenticity, and shame. Brené spent the first five years of her decade-long study focusing on shame and empathy, and is now using that work to explore a concept that she calls Wholeheartedness. She poses the questions:

How do we learn to embrace our vulnerabilities and imperfections so that we can engage in our lives from a place of authenticity and worthiness? How do we cultivate the courage, compassion, and connection that we need to recognize that we are enough – that we are worthy of love, belonging, and joy?

I first heard of Brene via TED and I highly recommend you check out her talk

I’m currently reading her book The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are and plan to write about it once I have finished, but I just wanted to make sure you were aware of Brene and her research.

To give you a bit of a taste test (in 140 characters of less!) here is what I tweeted during her talk:

• Brene Brown talking about the gift of imperfection: building authenticity & courage in leadership & life. Awesome start – so funny!

• Difference btw motivation & inspiration. We motivate people by what we know. We motivate people by who we ARE.

• Brene Brown – what is it that we are up against? We live in a culture of never enough. The shame / fear of not being extraordinary.

• We can navigate the culture of scarcity through embracing vulnerability.

• What we know about ourselves is not as important as how we treat ourselves.

• Close ourselves off from vulnerability & pay a price. Vulnerability is the birth place of love, joy, innovation, creativity.

• How do we access joy? Actively practice gratitude. Pay attention & be grateful for the ordinary moments.

• Hope is learned. You cultivate hope by setting goals, pathways (to achieve), agency (I can do this).

• You can’t numb selectively – numb the bad, numb the good.

• Kids should be encouraged to fail. If not they become fearful of try anything they don’t already KNOW they are good at.

• Act of courage: let ourselves be seen

• Brene Brown fav quote- don’t try to win over the haters, you are not the jackass whisperer!

• To live a creative life we must lose our fear of being wrong.

• ‘Cool’ is an emotional straight jacket – you’ve got to be ‘uncool’ to be innovative.

• Vulnerability in men shakes women to the core. We don’t know how to hold space for that. We need to practice.

You may also like:

• Do one thing a day that scares you
• Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending